By Psychic-Magic Contributor Renji
Negativity is a major challenge, both in ourselves and those around us. It can come from deep-seated beliefs in our unconscious that, like a computer virus, activate when someone “pushes our buttons”. It can come from the fear that we cannot move beyond a certain point, so we give up trying. Negativity can come from beliefs and thoughts that trap us in our comfort zone and keep us from moving forward—even though we aren’t truly comfortable.
Our deep-seated beliefs come from words and phrases we’ve taken in throughout our life. We don’t think about them, and may not even realize they’re there, but they will sabotage us whenever they can. Someone telling us “You’re so dumb” at age five lingers in the unconscious and, at some level, we believe (for example) we are not smart enough to get into college.
Negativity keeps us in a holding pattern, like a plane circling an airport. We don’t do anything but circle through our list of beliefs and negative thoughts. We feel stagnant, stifled and worthless. Is it any wonder people who work in confining little cubicles call the work world “the rat race” and feel as if they’re running in a maze?
Sometimes, by focusing on what holds us back, we can use our will to forge ahead. Other times, that’s more difficult and we actually sabotage ourselves. The little voice inside that says, “I’m dumb” or “I’m a loser” restrains us, ruins relationships, keeps us from satisfying jobs, and makes us feel less than we are. Affirmations such as “I’m smart”, “I’m intelligent” or “I’m a winner” may help, but that may not be enough if your negativity stems from an unconscious belief. Your unconscious belief that you are unworthy sabotages your life, and if it doesn’t, in unconscious ways you may actually sabotage yourself because, on a deep level, you don’t feel worthy.
A common phrase we use around Psychic-Magic is “where attention goes, energy flows.” It’s the Law of Attraction. Your dominant beliefs attract what you believe. We do what makes us comfortable. We hang out with the people who make us comfortable, which is why like attracts like. Rich people hang out with rich people. Cliques. By putting ourselves in an uncomfortable situation, like hanging out with people not like ourselves, we challenge ourselves to be more, do more and have more. Do you want to be like the piano that, when someone in the next room plays a chord, you resonate with that same chord?
In order to change, we have to allow ourselves to be uncomfortable and then actually get comfortable with being uncomfortable. If we can face our fears, negative thoughts and counter-productive behavior and expand our consciousness, we can attract different outcomes, and in this way, we can continue to grow.
Showing posts with label Negativity. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Negativity. Show all posts
Monday, January 2, 2012
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Thank You, But I Don’t Need Your Negativity
By Psychic-Magic Editor Karen Howard
A friend once told me that her Scandinavian forebears had a unique way of “freezing out” unwanted energies.
The technique is to take a piece of white paper and write the full name of the person (as you know it—you may only know his/her first name) that is sending negative energy or bad thoughts your way. Then invert a tea cup over the name and draw a circle around it, and then draw a square (box or fence) around the circle. Put the paper in the freezer (you can put it in an envelope if you don’t want others who use the freezer to see it).
Does it work? Judge for yourself.
In the days before newsletters were available on the Internet I was invited to write articles about hypnosis for a New Age publication. Having studied hypnosis and taught with a couple of hypnosis schools, I was delighted to share with the newsletter’s readers. When the editor asked if I would answer reader questions, I enthusiastically said I would do so by mail, and also made myself available to take phone calls one evening a week.
In the course of one conversation, a caller asked if I would hypnotize her over the phone. The schools where I had taught cautioned strongly against doing so, as there was no way to watch the client and gauge what was happening during the session. I told the caller that my teachers and colleagues considered this an unethical practice and I was not comfortable doing it. She angrily retorted that another hypnotist who contributed to the newsletter did it, and I suggested she contact that person.
I forgot about the conversation and went about my life. Knowing how difficult it is to keep ahead of deadlines, I sent several articles to the newsletter’s editor for upcoming issues, and was surprised a short time later to receive them back with a note that, in essence, said, “I know what you’re up to, and I won’t tolerate it.”
I was at a loss as to what the editor meant, and (in those pre-email days) wrote a short letter to ask if there was anything offensive in my articles, and if so, what it was so that I could make changes. Another letter arrived, and left me more puzzled than ever. It gave no indication of what the editor thought I was “up to.” A flurry of letters arrived, each more vitriolic than the last. The reason for the venom finally came to light when I was accused of calling the other hypnotist “unethical” and casting a spell to ruin her business. I knew it was futile to assure the editor that I would never do such a thing. Throughout the interchange, there was no attempt on the editor’s part to get my side of the incident.
I stopped all correspondence with the editor and thought that would be the end of it, but letters continued to pour in, each more nasty than the last. I tried several techniques to sever ties with the editor, but none seemed to work. I felt helpless. That was when I decided to “freeze out” the editor. The letters stopped and life went back to normal.
Another example is someone I’ll call Bobbi, who was having difficulties at work. Management was at odds, and the “trickle down” effect had reached the staff support level. She reported that supervisors consistently pushed their own priorities ahead of others’, and one supervisor began accusing everyone of being against him. The atmosphere was depressing and hostile. Bobbi didn’t want to quit her job, but the “bad vibes” from upper management made her miserable.
“Freeze out” became Bobbi’s only solution. Bobbi didn’t want to freeze a person out of her life; she simply wanted to freeze out the negativity. The technique is basically the same, although rather than write the individual’s name, she wrote “John David Smith’s negativity at the office” and made the circle and square and put it in the freezer. She did this with all management involved. The situation cleared up.
For those who have been downsized, it’s often hard not to have bad feelings about the situation and the people who gave us the bad news, “Sorry, you’re out of here.” Sometimes we commiserate with others who were downsized, having what some of my clients have called “pity parties”, where everyone talks about how bad things are, how bad things were, and the rotten people in management. It can either be a catharsis or a really negative experience.
Things can be even more negative when you run into people you used to work with; people who still have their jobs. They complain about things like, “George is just as mean as ever” or “Alice still doesn’t know how to do anything.” We listen to this negativity and think, “Well, at least you still have a job.”
By freezing out the negativity—and the people we perceive as injecting it into our lives—we can finally get on with our lives.
Some challenges come into our lives as lessons. When we learn the lesson, the challenge is resolved. On occasion we are part of someone else’s challenge, and if they aren’t “getting it”, there’s little we can do. When we’ve exhausted all avenues, freeze out might be the only alternative.
A friend once told me that her Scandinavian forebears had a unique way of “freezing out” unwanted energies.
The technique is to take a piece of white paper and write the full name of the person (as you know it—you may only know his/her first name) that is sending negative energy or bad thoughts your way. Then invert a tea cup over the name and draw a circle around it, and then draw a square (box or fence) around the circle. Put the paper in the freezer (you can put it in an envelope if you don’t want others who use the freezer to see it).
Does it work? Judge for yourself.
In the days before newsletters were available on the Internet I was invited to write articles about hypnosis for a New Age publication. Having studied hypnosis and taught with a couple of hypnosis schools, I was delighted to share with the newsletter’s readers. When the editor asked if I would answer reader questions, I enthusiastically said I would do so by mail, and also made myself available to take phone calls one evening a week.
In the course of one conversation, a caller asked if I would hypnotize her over the phone. The schools where I had taught cautioned strongly against doing so, as there was no way to watch the client and gauge what was happening during the session. I told the caller that my teachers and colleagues considered this an unethical practice and I was not comfortable doing it. She angrily retorted that another hypnotist who contributed to the newsletter did it, and I suggested she contact that person.
I forgot about the conversation and went about my life. Knowing how difficult it is to keep ahead of deadlines, I sent several articles to the newsletter’s editor for upcoming issues, and was surprised a short time later to receive them back with a note that, in essence, said, “I know what you’re up to, and I won’t tolerate it.”
I was at a loss as to what the editor meant, and (in those pre-email days) wrote a short letter to ask if there was anything offensive in my articles, and if so, what it was so that I could make changes. Another letter arrived, and left me more puzzled than ever. It gave no indication of what the editor thought I was “up to.” A flurry of letters arrived, each more vitriolic than the last. The reason for the venom finally came to light when I was accused of calling the other hypnotist “unethical” and casting a spell to ruin her business. I knew it was futile to assure the editor that I would never do such a thing. Throughout the interchange, there was no attempt on the editor’s part to get my side of the incident.
I stopped all correspondence with the editor and thought that would be the end of it, but letters continued to pour in, each more nasty than the last. I tried several techniques to sever ties with the editor, but none seemed to work. I felt helpless. That was when I decided to “freeze out” the editor. The letters stopped and life went back to normal.
Another example is someone I’ll call Bobbi, who was having difficulties at work. Management was at odds, and the “trickle down” effect had reached the staff support level. She reported that supervisors consistently pushed their own priorities ahead of others’, and one supervisor began accusing everyone of being against him. The atmosphere was depressing and hostile. Bobbi didn’t want to quit her job, but the “bad vibes” from upper management made her miserable.
“Freeze out” became Bobbi’s only solution. Bobbi didn’t want to freeze a person out of her life; she simply wanted to freeze out the negativity. The technique is basically the same, although rather than write the individual’s name, she wrote “John David Smith’s negativity at the office” and made the circle and square and put it in the freezer. She did this with all management involved. The situation cleared up.
For those who have been downsized, it’s often hard not to have bad feelings about the situation and the people who gave us the bad news, “Sorry, you’re out of here.” Sometimes we commiserate with others who were downsized, having what some of my clients have called “pity parties”, where everyone talks about how bad things are, how bad things were, and the rotten people in management. It can either be a catharsis or a really negative experience.
Things can be even more negative when you run into people you used to work with; people who still have their jobs. They complain about things like, “George is just as mean as ever” or “Alice still doesn’t know how to do anything.” We listen to this negativity and think, “Well, at least you still have a job.”
By freezing out the negativity—and the people we perceive as injecting it into our lives—we can finally get on with our lives.
Some challenges come into our lives as lessons. When we learn the lesson, the challenge is resolved. On occasion we are part of someone else’s challenge, and if they aren’t “getting it”, there’s little we can do. When we’ve exhausted all avenues, freeze out might be the only alternative.
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